While I was battling cancer my husband was sexting our neighbour’s daughter

DEAR DEIDRE: HOW am I meant to trust my husband after I caught him sexting our neighbour’s daughter?

He’s 51, I’m 53 and we’ve been married for 23 years.

Last year I was diagnosed with breast cancer and the chemotherapy drugs wiped me out.

I’m rarely in the mood for sex.

His phone kept going off at night but he said it was work emails from the US.

I picked it up and found messages to our neighbour’s 24-year-old daughter.

They were intense – discussing bondage and different toys they wanted to use together.

How could he do this?

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DEIDRE SAYS: Messaging this girl gives him a welcome distraction from what is going on right now.

And it sounds like he is struggling with the lack of intimacy in your relationship.

That is no excuse but it is something you can work on.

There are things you can do that don’t involve full sex, like kissing, cuddling and massages.

Say you feel there is a change between you and you want to know what is going on for him.

Couples’ counselling might help. My support pack will show where to find help locally

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